Wednesday, May 14, 2008

The Mother's Board Meetin'

Lawd knows I love being on the Mother’s board, but them old hags bore me to death. This past Tuesday we had our monthly meeting and I prepared ma’self for death row by inhaling some on my glaucoma medicine. Baby let me tell you my grandson keeps him a stash of dat gunja in his coat pocket. Dumb chile’ thanks I don’t know bout it but I be pinching off it every chance I get. Why is it that peoples who smoke weed don’t thank otha peoples know they smoke weed? They lips and finger tips be all burned and they eyes be all red. They come in eatin all the damn cereals in the house. See an experienced woman like me knows how to keep mine on the down low. I puts me on a pair of them operation gloves so my fangers don’t stank and get burned up. I puts on my big church hat and pops a mint in my mouth. Then I sprayss on some of my favorites floral perfume. Chile' them deacons knows they loves my perfume. Everytime I walks pass one of them they jus be smiling and thangs.

Anyway, the Mother's board meeting was okay cept Mother Wilma is a one long winded prayer. Seems to me she prays a whole damn novel. Hell I was ready to get up out that church house and head to my house cause I had my suger son (opposite of suger daddy) Tyron there waiting for me in them black boxer briefs I likes to see him in. For all the ladies that aint got no suger son you mights wanna get you one. Them younger mens don't be needing no viagra likes them mens my age. Take care now.


Signed
Ruthie Ann

13 comments:

Ticia said...

AHAHAH - white gloves---

What abt the eyelash curler....


*don't ask any questions*

Dreamy said...

Girl at least somebody gettin some around here. And yes them damn boxer breifs is so sexy,lol. I am having a flash back of that last negro I used to mess with. He was sexy and he knew how to put it down. *sigh*

Omar Ramon said...

oh my gosh...is this for real??...nah...can't be...can it??

Chile, I'm is comin' back here fa sho!

Promiscuous X said...

Lol @ she be praying a novel. I hate the part of church wen they waste 10-15mins of church giving announcements. I been done came off my high by then...the holy ghost has left the building LMAO.

Good post yall

btw TICIA please explain the eye lash curler....dont tell me u got a backup jus in case u scinge the other one lmmfao

fuzzy said...

Yesss sa! You better tell it Ms. Ruthie Ann! No viagra for me! Get you a suga son with some briefs! the tight ones! lol

That glove, I aint messin wit you!!! They prayed a novel in service today! I wanted to throw that after preachin glass of water on her! What do people thing when they are prayin in that mic?

proacTiff said...

so true bout the "young mens." and since you are doling out helpful 'glaucoma' advice I'd like to advise you on adding a pair of blue blockers to your treatment!

much respect, sista ruthie ann.

pro'

The F_Uitlist said...

ROFL at white gloves and perfumes!

I don't mess with weed but if I did I know some folks who could use this advice.

Queen of My Castle said...

Wow...black boxer briefs. Tres sexy. LOL.

Blah Blah Blah said...

You oinch off weed...I drink the clear alcohol and pour in water to bring it back up to the level it was at before...I got thirsty.

In all my years...I've not had a younger man. Older men are so much easier to handle with less stress and they give up money alot faster. Just sayin'...some things really are better than dck. :)

Anonymous said...

Hey ladies. By chance do you all go to World Changers? Just asking because I remember going to a talent skow there for the singles ministry and two ladies performed a skit that your blog reminds me of. Just wondering if it's you two. Either way, this blog is hilarium!

SistaSocialite said...

LMAO Sugar Son hahaha. This is hilarious, I gotta come back for more!

The Second Sixty-Eight said...

You a hot mess Ruthie Ann.

Rodney said...

Off da chain!